I Am The Muse!

The Reinvention

A couple months ago I posed the question: "to reinvent or to revolutionize?" I was not referring to anything in particular at the time, but it got me thinking about the Artist that I am becoming and how different she is from the always logical LW-C we all know and love. Finally the answer came to me, REINVENT, and from there my whole artistic platform began to take shape.

As I contemplated my projects, I realized that this was more than just a book and a radio show, this was my official emergence as an Artist. My first crack at letting the person that lives in my head take full control of my body. My husband always reminds me "to get the things you never had, you have to do the things you've never done." I have taken this mantra to heart and challenged myself at every turn. By doing so, I have become quite comfortable with having The Muse at the helm and letting Logical LaNora take a much needed break.

The way I see it, LW-C has been working tirelessly for the past 32 years with excellent results. Pretty much the definition of the "American Dream"- from the streets of South Central Los Angeles to degrees from Berkeley and NYU Law, a successful career as an attorney at an AmLaw Top 50 firm, a model 8 year marriage to an exceptionally supportive, beautiful black man, two smart and beautiful babies, properties in 3 states, great friends and a social life to boot. Everything I had on my list, I have accomplished and I imagine my maker saying to me "well done my good and faithful servant," BUT "what have you created?, how have you used your gifts and talents to make a mark on the world?"

Well, LW-C's bag of tricks was exhausted so I decided that if God saw something more for my life, there must be something or someone inside of me that could pull it off. As you know if you have been following my journey, I scaled back my budding business and took the time to "find my artist," that vulnerable and creative part of myself that was trapped under 30 years of rubble. I dug and dug until my hands were raw and bloody and just when I was beginning to doubt the fruitfulness of my efforts...I heard a faint voice.

Enters The Muse

So you know that my business is called Muse Creative Arts Agency, and the name came from the 12 years I have spent being a muse to my oh so talented husband. He has been drawing or painting me since I met him and even when a character is not me, people always see me in it somehow. This was my first foray into the artistic world...the inspirer. I always believed that I was blessed with superior intellect and no real talent and I went into my business with that in mind. I was always attracted to the creative world (I mean, really, I married a painter) and figured that my role in that world must be to help the ones with the talent get their message to the masses and make some money in the process. So, I went about the business of making this happen.

Well, along the way I realized that I was coming up with great ideas all the time. When I would share them with others they would get really excited about the possibility, but I would always end up tabling my own projects and jumping onto other people's dreams. I was living out that saying "those who can, do. those who can't, teach. " I believed that I was strategically creative, but I could not actually create myself. I thought that if I could succeed in helping make someone else's dream a reality, the dreamer inside of me would be satisfied. Wrong! I had the formula backwards, by finding a community of Artists to embrace The Muse, the Artist inside of Me was awakened.

She started out timid, weak from decades of neglect. I had to learn how to be a proper caregiver, being sure that she was provided with the proper amount of food, water and sleep so that she would grow strong. I had to cleanse myself of the fears, doubts, and excuses that plagued my existence so that I would not pass them on to her. Slowly she began to come into her own and, just like my two year old daughter with all the tasks I used to complete for her, she declared "I can do it." True to her word, once I got out of the way, The Muse proved that she could stand on her own two feet. She did such a great job, I decided to let her borrow mine for the next 8 years.

Passing the Torch

So, as of August 8th, 2011, the 32nd anniversary of my birth, The Muse has had full reign and that chick is FIERCE! As I said before, I plan to retire by the time I am 40 so it is only fitting that The Muse take over for the next 8 years to take my journey from the imagined to the unimaginable. I have to admit that I am in awe of myself for being so open to my journey and finding a way to get out of my own way. By doing so, I have tapped into my niche and found my VOICE.

MCa2 Productions

Ok, so I started out talking about reinvention and now that I am here in the Big Apple, I have decided to incorporate the next branch of my business (M C a squared Productions) wherein The Muse's projects will be housed. I can not tell you how excited I am to finally be out of my head and back to doing the work. If this blog is your only connection to me, you may think that talking, thinking and strategizing is all I do, but I really feel more comfortable staying out of my head and having my nose to the grind.

To that end, I have been setting and knocking out deadlines left and right. The first being my long awaited book proposal for The Other N Word! I am proud to announce that I woke up this morning to a completed rough draft ready for my final edits. I will spend the rest of the day getting it in good shape and then let it sit for awhile before I make the next move. I believe that I have a new perspective to add to the conversation about the "state of Black America" and I want to make sure that I am being true to my voice without sacrificing my credibility and, consequently, my possible reach.

I am now free to go into full production mode on my radio show. I am attempting something that I believe is completely original, yet pays homage to various traditional, and traditionally Black, art forms. Another aspect of reinvention.

On October 11th, I have my official photoshoot with designer Brian Evans who has created an amazing "coming out" outfit for me and photographer Bryant Johnson who has an uncanny ability to capture The Muse inside of me.

Finally, I am working on my first TV pitch package. I already have one idea that has been given the thumbs up for further development and I have several more that I plan to present as I team up with an established director/producer to prepare for my first round of pitches to the networks with which he has established relationships. This will be my primary focus after I get my first A-MusE-N broadcast under my belt.

By 11/11/11, I will have my marketing materials complete as I present myself to the world as a fully emerged Artist. I am working on an article that I hope will be accepted by a national publication by that date and will stand as my break out piece as a writer. Needless to say, I have my work cut out for me!

Although this may sound like a lot, it is nothing compared to the 24/7 mental marathon I have been on for the last year or so. Since I have been actually writing my book and drafting the proposal, creating the content for my radio show, and developing my television show concepts, I have had much less anxiety than when I was simply thinking through my book, figuring out the concept for my show and thinking of TV show ideas. Contrary to popular belief, it has been much easier "done than said" for me and I look forward to sharing my results with you through this blog and my Art with you through my manifestations. Wish me luck!

-The Muse